1. What happened? Describe the situation as plainly as you can.

2. How did the anger feel — was it hot, cold, slow, sudden? How did it show up in your body?

3. What did you want to do in that moment? What did you actually do?

1. What felt wrong or unjust about what happened?

2. What expectation was not met? Was that expectation reasonable? Was it communicated?

3. Whose standard of right and wrong are you measuring against — God's, your own, or someone else's?

1. Is there hurt underneath this anger? What were you hoping for that you did not receive?

2. Is there fear underneath this anger? What are you afraid of losing, or what feels threatened?

3. Is there grief underneath this anger? What has been lost — in this situation or in a longer pattern?

1. What did you want most in this situation? Is that desire in itself good?

2. When a good desire becomes a controlling demand, anger often follows. Is that happening here?

3. What would it look like to hold that desire openly before God rather than demanding it from another person?

1. What is the righteous and loving response to this situation — not the comfortable one, but the faithful one?

2. Is there something you need to say? Is there something you need to release?

3. Who do you need to be in this situation, by grace?